Joshua's Journey: Day 36

Look mommy, you can see my face and I'm wide awake!

Today God has really pressed upon My heart to be THANKFUL!

Thankful for the person who drives super slow in front of me, so I can learn that I don't always have to go at Stephanie speed. I am very likely missing out on some things God wants to teach me and show me because I am going so fast.

Thankful for my dogs that get on my last nerve, because no matter how made or frustrated I get, they are always waiting at the door to greet me with a smile when I come home.

Thankful Joshua is in the NICU, though I'd rather be holding him in the comfort of my own home, he  is surrounded by nurses and doctors that care about him and love on him when we aren't there.

Thankful that Joshua's story is part of our story! 

When I look at how far he has already come in these first 37 days of his life, I am thankful! God has been with us through every step of this journey and has had to carry us at some points. Though I know we have many obstacles still to overcome, I feel we are  at a place where God wants to use us to be there for, pray for and support, in whatever way we can, other families in our shoes. We have ya'll in which we could not be more thankful for, but some families don't have that support. So, as we brainstorm and pray about what God has for us in this ministry, I ask for your prayers that God would make apparent what He wants us to do. I have thought about making a Facebook page for parents of babies in the NICU that people can post prayers and such, but don't really know the logistics. Well, enough of that for now, I'm sure you are wondering about the little guy. 

He's having a great day today. His blue number still jumps all over the place a bit when he's closer to the end of his feeding and he still is breathing a bit shallow at times, but he's getting better. He weighed 3 lbs 6 oz, which means he has gained a whole pound from his birth weight. Way to go, Joshua. He's continuing to be more and more alert! It's so fun!

Specifics to pray for:

That he will continue to gain weight, eat well and his reflux goes away.

He will show us ministry opportunities and be glorified

His oxygen level will stay in the high 90's-100

Blessings and wisdom for NICU staff.

Thank you!!!

Joshua's Journey: Day 35

We just received a phone call telling us the echo (heart scan) was good!!! The first one they did at one week seemed to look like he had pulmonary stenosis which means his artery going to his lung gets skinnier for a bit and then widens out again, but they said he doesn't have it:) So that's great! He still has a bit of a murmur, bit that is closing up as well. Thanks for all the prayers! God is taking care of that little guy. It's a joy to watch!!!  I can't express enough how much I have learned about prayer, the power of it and how often I take it forgranted. We have open lines to communicate with our Creator and we don't take advantage of the opportunity nearly enough. He so wants to hear from us!

Joshua weighed 3 lbs 5 oz tonight. Derek got to hang out with him a bit and even got him to take his pacifier! He's a great dad. I must share another funny Maddy story tonight. Derek went to pick her up to change her into pajamas and she was not ready, so when he bent over, she dropped down to the ground and crawled straight through his legs. I tried to get it on video, but was unsuccessful.

Specifics to pray for:

That he will continue to have less and less episodes. The majority of them happen now because of reflux. Please pray that the reflux will go away and he will handle his food well.

His oxygenation can always be prayed for! That it will stay in the high 90s-100 level.

He begins to be able to adjust his own temperature instead of the bed doing it for him. He's getting there!

He has some friends that are getting ready to go home. Pray that they will get to go home soon, but not sooner than they need to.

For blessings and wisdom for the NICU staff, have I said that we LOVE them, they love our Joshua and give him great care. They cannot be thanked enough.

For us to be open to opportunities He gives us to be a light to others and that He will always be glorified. He gets all the credit!

Next big thing(s):

Breathing completely on his own. No help from the vapotherm or canula. They will begin to lower the pressure of the vapotherm to see how he tolerates it until eventually it will hardly be any pressure at all.

He will begin to practice feeding next week, I think, pray that he's a natural and feeds well!

Joshua's Journey: Day 34

We had some exciting news when we walked in to see Joshua this afternoon! We could see his sweet face. They had taken him off the big cpap with all the headgear and he was now on the vapotherm with a little nasal canula. It is great! The doctor also came in and checked his eyes and said that they look good! They will check them again in a week, so we just need to pray they keep growing like they are supposed to. So, it's been a good day:) What a joy it was to see his face better while holding him! There are times during the day and when I am holding him that his oxygenation level, the number we like at 100, goes all over the place with some major dips. They decided to recheck his heart to check on the murmur and one other thing that I forget what it was called and would not have a clue how to spell it. We should get results tomorrow. He lost a tad bit of weight tonight, but that okay with the 3 oz weight gain yesterday, he just needs to go in the positive tomorrow. Thanks for all the prayers. God deserves all the credit. I can't wait to see what God does in this little guys life as he gets older!

I know I've said Maddy is at such a fun age for us right now, and I must share a Maddy moment with y'all. One of her favorite things to do right now is climb. She will pull out a chair from the kitchen table and climb on the table. I put her in time out when she decides to climb when I tell her not to. I did that tonight and not two minutes later she gets her baby doll and puts her in time out too. Say counts to 3 and then tries to go higher and tells the baby no no! I wish I had my phone to video it. She's such a stinker!!  Can't wait for her to meet her brother.

Specifics to pray for:

That the heart scan will come back with great results and that Joshua's oxygenation numbers stay in the high 90's, preferably 100:)

His eyes continue to grow well and they see improvement in the growth next week.

The he gains weight tonight and tolerates his feedings well. That his reflux will get better, which may be causing his oxygenation number to bounce all over the place.

That he continues to stay infection free.

For wisdom and blessing on all the NICU staff as they care for Joshua and all his little friends.

For our family to all get back to healthy! Derek had a bit of a temperature tonight and felt achy, Maddy has had a cold and I just feel pretty exhausted a lot of the time. That pumping just really takes it out of me! I'm ready for it to be Joshua directly, which should be in the next week!

Next big thing(s):

That he will get off the nasal canula soon, but when ready, so then he will just have his feeding tube as far as tubes go.

That he will breast feed well when he starts these next few days.

Joshua's Journey: Day 33

We went and told Joshua good morning this morning and he was doing good. After that we went home to work on some projects we need to get finished before he comes home. Derek and his mom with some extra special help from Maddy worked on rewooding the deck because there were some rotten boards that weren't safe for Maddy or Joshua. My mom and I finished cleaning out what is going to be Maddy's room, so that it can be painted (Thanks a million, Brenda) on Tuesday. We came back up to the hospital at 3 so that I could get in some snuggle time, which I am thoroughly enjoying as I am typing. He's holding onto my hair:) When we got here though, had kept having multiple episodes, which is hard for me. It's never fun for us to see him dropping his heart rate constantly. Juanette suctioned him out really good and it seemed to help a lot! He also does this thing where his blue number (the one we love to see at 100) goes all over the place when I'm holding him. These are two things I will list in prayer later, too!
One thing that I am learning as this journey continues is that it can either draw Derek and me closer or it can pull us apart. This time, even as good as it's going, is stressful, and mix that with being a girl, let's just say I get a bit emotional at times. Derek does an amazing job of looking past the things I do and say and loves me unconditionally! He is the best husband, father and leader this family could ever have. We are truly blessed! We appreciate the prayers for us and our marriage during this time as well. Y'all are amazing. Thank you for the constant prayers. We serve an awesome God!
We just found out Joshua gained 80 grams tonight. That makes him 3 lbs 4 oz!


Specifics to pray for:

That Joshua will oxygenate well and stop jumping all over the place at times. We like 100, but will take high 90's!

He will go on vapotherm or the nasal canula soon! Hopefully that will help some with all the mucus build up he's having that causes him not to be able to breath and then have episodes.

He will digest his food and have less reflux, which also causes episodes.

For God to be glorified and for us to be looking for and seeing opportunities to be a light.

For wisdom and blessing on NICU staff.

For all Joshua's friends and their parents that are in the NICU.

That Maddy will continue to feel better and praise that she didn't have an ear infection.

Next big thing:

He will have his eyes examined sometime soon. Pray they are growing like they are supposed to and that the oxygen doesn't affect his vision.

Joshua's Journey: Day 32

Joshua is doing great, but his mommy needs sleep, so this is short and sweet tonight.

  

Specifics to pray for:

He will continue to have less episodes and will oxygenate well. 

That he will learn to regulate his own temperature good.

He will get on the nasal canula or vapotherm as soon as he can.

For all of his friends and their parents in the NICU

Wisdom and blessings in the staff

That God will be glorified through us!

Goodnight:)

Joshua's Journey: Day 31

Happy one month birthday, Joshua Derek French!!! If that isn't great enough, guess what else we found out today, we hit the 3 lb mark. He's a growing boy and such a great little blessing. I can't wait for Maddy to meet him! God is good!

The next big test we have is his eye test. He will actually get his eyes dilated which can be tough for him. The test should be some time either this weekend or next. Pray that his eyes are growing the way it should and that his eyes are not being affected by the oxygen.

We are so thankful for all the prayers and support. We can't begin to tell you how much y'all mean to us and the impact you have made in our lives. It's been a month, hopefully the next two will fly by and we will be heading home before we know it.

Specifics to pray for:

Praises for all that God has done so far in Joshua's life and ours.

For his eyes to grow the way they need to and for him to have good vision.

For Joshua to continue to feed well and grow.

That he continues to have less episodes and oxygenates well.

For Maddy's congestion to go away and she doesn't get an ear infection!

God will be glorified through Joshua's story and our lives.

Joshua's Journey: Day 30

The head ultrasound came back unremarkable, which in our terms means his head looks great! I had a churning in my stomach when I asked Jill, the nurse that had Joshua today, the results. She had not even seen the results when I asked. So, she looked at the computer and said it was unremarkable. I didn't know what to think of that word. I was glad to hear it's a good thing!  God deserves all the praise!

I can't believe Joshua will be one month old tomorrow. Y'all are welcome to come celebrate with us at the hospital from 4:30-6. We will be there! He's been called a chunk by some of the nurses that haven't seen him in a while. I'm ready for him to hit the 3 lb mark, but he's being kind of stubborn and is getting as close to it as he can without actually hitting it. Hopefully tonight or tomorrow he will get there!

Specifics to pray for:

Praise that his brain scan came back unremarkable!

That his eyes will be developing well and not be affected by the oxygen.

He will continue to stay infection free.

That he will continue to gain weight and tolerate the feedings.

For wisdom and blessings on the NICU staff.

For him to oxygenate well and have less and less episodes.

To get off the cpap and onto the vapotherm as soon as he's ready. Hopefully in a few days.

For Maddy to be able to adjust to this schedule and go to bed at a decent hour and to be ear infection free.

Joshua's Journey: Day 29

Joshua has continued to do well today. I held him again for a while and he would just stare at me. I loved it!!! He went up in weight a tad last night, but is still at 2 lbs 13 oz.  Hopefully he will break the big 3 lbs soon. The main thing that everyone can be praying for is his brain scan late tonight or early in the morning. It's more in depth then the one they did the first week. Please pray that everything looks great and his brain is developing like it should! We sooo appreciate all of you and your prayers, thanks a million!



Specifics to pray for:

The brain scan, of course!

That he will get off cpap and onto vapotherm or the nasal canula as soon as he's ready.

For continued balance in our lives. I don't want to be rushing all over the place all the time. That is usually my normal, but it's a bit more stressful to me right now.  I think God is trying to teach me to slow down a bit:)

For blessings and wisdom for the NICU staff.

That Maddy's cold will go away and I won't have to take her to the doctor. Runny nose = Maddy ear infection usually, which means tubes and I just don't want that right now.

Joshua's Journey: Day 28

Thank you so much for all the continued prayers for our little guy. We are so thankful for how he has progressed in the past few days. He is almost to the 3 lb mark!! Yeah!!! Hopefully by one month he will be there, which is Thursday, I can't believe it! He's done great today, and the really fun part is that he is opening his eyes so much more now!!

We took Maddy to the mall this evening to let her ride the carousel and I finally got a blanket embroidered for Joshua. I have forgotten the blanket every time I have gone into the mall to do it. Now, the only problem is we never got one for Maddy and she thinks it's her blankie. So, we are going to get her a matching blanket to her brothers! 

My eyes are open!

Specifics to pray for:

 

The scan of the brain will probably late Tuesday night/early Wednesday morning. Pray that everything comes back normal and his brain is developing like it should.

 

He will also get his eyes checked some time after the 30 days mark, which is Wednesday. Please pray that the oxygen has not damaged his eyes and that they too are developing like they should.

That I will slow down and allow God time to really teach me and grow me. I feel like my mind is constantly consumed with a to do list. I want to make sure I take the time to listen to what He has to say to me!

That God will pour wisdom and blessings on the NICU staff.

Joshua's Journey: Day 27

Today has been a great day! Both Derek and I were able to hold him and he's gained another oz, which puts him at 2 lbs 13 oz! With all this great news there is always an opportunity to forget how far God has brought us and how thankful we should be for what He has done. I keep thinking about the Israelites and how they saw God do so many great things, miracles, then so quickly went back to their old ways and complaining. I don't want to be like that. I want to remember and be thankful!!! So, the two words that keep coming to my mind are NEVER FORGET! Joshua has overcome a lot in these first 28 days but He has done none of it on his own.  God has been his strength and ours through this time. Thank you Lord for all the great things you have already done in Joshua's life and for the amazing friends and family that are here to support and pray for us all along the way. This journey isn't Joshua's alone, it's ours to learn from and grow, and my prayer is that God will teach us all how to glorify Him more and NEVER FORGET what He has brought us through to allow us to draw closer to Him.

Specifics to pray for:

That he will continue to oxygenate well, have fewer episodes and be able to get on the vapotherm as quickly as possible, but when ready!

The oxygen that he is getting has a potential of damaging his eyes, please pray that his eyes fully develop and the oxygen does not harm them.

For his brain scan this week to come back normal and for his brain to continue developing like it's supposed to.

That his lungs will continue to grow and will be able to work more and more on their own without tiring out.

Blessing and wisdom for the NICU staff as they take care of all the babies. 

That all if us will NEVER FORGET what God has done in our lives and we will be changed people because of it. May God be glorified!

Joshua's Journey: Day 26

All of us have had a great day today. Joshua has had many fewer episodes these past couple of days! It's been great hanging out with him and not hearing the monitor go off so often. Thanks for all the prayers for that, and we appreciate and thank you in advance all the continued prayers. He was 2 lbs 11 oz last night when they weighed him and they will actually do his length and head circumference tonight. He still had a little ways to go before he gets to wear clothes.  He has to get a bit more meat on his bones, but I can't wait!

Maddy's cousin, Jackson, came to play with Maddy today. They had a great time. Jackson would push Maddy around in her stroller that was meant for her baby!



Specifics to pray for:

That he will continue to do well on breathing and oxygenating his body. Continued prayer for less episodes and a high oxygenation level!!

Pray for his brain scan coming up next week to be clear and for his brain to be developing like it should.

Blessings and wisdom for the staff. They truly are amazing.


For God to be glorified through all if us! That we will grow closer as a family and to The Lord through all if this.

Joshua's Journey: Day 25

Joshua has really had a good past two days! We have had some great snuggle time together. I was able to hold him for over two hours today and he didn't move at all the whole time he was on me. It was great! They lowered the pressure that he is getting through his cpap today, which is good! He also gained about an ounce last night, which makes him a little over 2 lbs 10 oz.  Getting closer to be able to wear clothes. We will be at the hospital tomorrow from 4:30-6 if anyone wants to come see the little guy.
It's my turn to speak some kind words about my hubby. He has become such an amazing leader of this household. He talks to so many different guys in the NICU with a desire to really learn their story and be a light for all he comes in contact with. It's awesome! I would ask that you continue to pray for our marriage through this journey. God has done great things already, but I know I get tired and frustrated at times and I just need a little extra patience and grace during this time. I know that we are stronger together than we would ever be alone and I'm glad I have my best friend to go through this with me.

Specifics to pray for:

Joshua continues to have less episodes and stays in the high 90's-100 for oxygenation and will be able to be on the vapotherm as soon as his little lungs are ready for it.

He will have another brain scan next week. Pray for everything to be growing and forming together well and for normal results.

He continues to gain weight each day and he remains his fiesty little self.

For wisdom for and blessings upon the NICU staff.

For his heart murmur and the other small issues with his heart to heal naturally and quickly.

God will be glorified in all of our lives.

Joshua's Journey: Day 24

Today was a pretty good day for our little guy. His nurse said that he did not brady at all today, which means his heart rate did not drop due to the lack of him not breathing. Since the night two weeks ago when he gave us the scare, he has had a couple each day. But praise to God, he made it through a whole day today without one! Stephanie held our little guy again today for kangaroo time, I walked in at the end of that coming back from work. I love getting to see my beautiful wife holding my son, they both look like they could not be more comfortable! I think steph could also do with Maddy on the other arm along with Joshua! Josh went up to 22 cc's of milk today. I think he has his daddy's appetite. The nurse last night tried to suck some of his snot out but it would not come. It was too dried out so she gave him a couple drops of saline and the next nurse got probably at least 2 ounces out of his nose. It was more than the last time that I thought they suctioned a gallon out. I think he was just able to better breath today without the obstructions blocking his little airways.

We went to a support group for the parents of the NICU babies and meet some new parents that we have not yet met. One of the parents were about to go home, and the baby was a couple of weeks away from his due date, which is awsome because it gives us plenty of hope that Josh could maybe get to come home early as well. It was nice to talk to the other parents, even though it was mostly small talk. i love shining my light for others to see Christ in me. Stephanie's light seems to always be on high beams, she is so strong in her faith that it always lifts me up. thank you again for the prayers and support.

Specifics to pray for:



I can't wait to get off CPAP so ya'll can see my cute face!

That Joshua's breathing is constant and his oxygenation stays in the upper 90's to 100. He was doing good while I was holding him today!

For Joshua to get off the CPAP and go to vapotherm as soon as he can, but only when he's ready! Wisdom for all to know when that is.
Blessings on all the NICU staff and wisdom as they take care of all the babies.

For all the one month test and scans to come back with great news!

There are many babies going home this weekend and many that just got in the NICU. Pray for the babies and their families as they adjust.

For our marriage to solidify even more during this time as God draws us closer to each other and closer to Him.

That we will glorify God in all of this and He will be apparent when He wants us to share Joshua's story with others and the hope that we have.

Joshua's Journey: Day 23

I am so ready for Joshua to be home. I know he's in great hands and it's sort of a necessity for him to be in the hospital right now, but I really am anticipating the day when Derek pulls the car up with Maddy in it and we pop the car seat into place and we head home. I can't wait! Then I can hold him whenever I want for however long I want and don't have to worry about trying to figure out how I'm going to go and see him with all the other things I need to do for work. We are going to have a big party and all of you are invited:)

I was able to hold Joshua again today and that time was great as always. He was breathing and oxygenating pretty good while I was there, but he still has some improving to do before they will switch him over to the nasal canula again. He didn't have the benefit of getting the steroid shots that most preemies are able to get when there is a bit more warning that they are coming out. They have found that those shots really help with lung development. I got one shot, but he came out about 1-2 hours later, so they didn't really get to kick in. So, he started off a bit behind on the lung development, but he's doing well and we just pray that he gets better and better each day.

He weighed 2 lbs 8 oz last night and then today he weighed 2 lbs 9 oz, so he's over the half way mark to 3 lbs. He's growing!!!

He wanted you to see his new camo blanket!!!

Specifics to pray for:

That he will oxygenate well and will not desate as much. Stay in the high 90's or 100 and will continue to have less and less episodes where he quits breathing.

He has a new nurse tonight, pray that God will bless her, give her wisdom and that we may be a light to her. Same for all the other NICU staff.

For me to continue to be excited for him to come home, but also patient enough to know that it is going to be a while and I have to take it one day at a time!

For God to be glorified and for us to learn what He wants to teach us during this time.

For you, that God will bless you and use you in great ways for His Kingdom. Thank you for the prayers. I know God would get us through this even if we were alone, but it's so much nicer being able to do this journey knowing that you are faithfully praying. THANK YOU!!!!

Joshua's Journey: Day 22

I love being able to share Joshua's story with people! Looking back on the past three weeks I have a mix of emotions, but one thing I can say is that in all my mix of emotions, God has been constant and faithful. I would never wish this road on anyone, but being in it I wouldn't change what we have learned, how God has grown us, and the love of family and community we have been able to experience through all the prayers and support. It truly has been a blessing!

Joshua has had another pretty good day today. I can't help but glue my eyes on the monitor when I walk into the room to see how he is doing.  When I'm not staring at the monitor, the second that it beeps, both Derek and my heads turn to see what his oxygen level is at that point. I can't wait until we get to the day that the level is constantly in the high 90's and we can focus on our sweet baby boy.

There weren't a whole lot of changes today. They did go up on the amount of food he gets each feed. He has tolerated it well, which has been good. They had not weighed him yet when I left, so I'll just have to keep you in suspense until tomorrow. Thanks again for all the prayers!

He covered his eyes when I turned on the
 light to get a better picture!

Specifics to pray for:

That Joshua will breathe regularly and deeply. (Oxygen level preferably 100, but we will take high 90's)

They did a repeat culture of Joshua's urine. Pray that there is NO INFECTION, and he continues to stay infection free.

For us to stop staring at the monitors and stare at our baby instead!

Rest for everyone. Maddy actually wanted to go to bed tonight. This is a first! Thanks for the prayers.

Find a balance with all that we are doing these next couple of months.

That God will be completely glorified in every circumstance of this journey!

Wisdom and blessing on all the NICU staff.

That we will be able to have great conversations with other NICU parents.

Joshua's Journey: Day 21

Today was the first day I didn't go up after shift change to see Joshua. It was hard telling him goodnight at 4:30 in the afternoon, but poor Maddy has no routine right now and we had been getting her to bed at 10:30-11:30 at night. Not good for a 20 month old or for us! She would be so tired that she would not fall asleep in her crib and ended up in bed with us for a bit. So tonight we got home, she got a bath and was in bed, her own, by 9:15. Still a bit later than normal but better than any other night thus far.
Joshua on the other hand sleeps all the time and I must say he has a very comfy bed. I would sleep all the time too, if I were him. He did get his PICC line out last night, so that's good! He is still having some issues at times keeping his blood oxygenated. The ideal number is 100. If it falls below 85 the monitor will beep. He does really good for a while and then all of the sudden it will drop down. If it stays down below 85 too long then they will raise his oxygen above 21%, which is what we breathe. The goal is for him to stay at 21% and 100 as soon as possible. He weighed 2 lbs 8 oz again tonight. They upped the amount of food he's getting again today and upped the calories that he gets, so we definitely know he's not going hungry:) They also changed the machine that he is using to breathe. It essentially does the same thing, but it hopefully will be easier on his poor little nose.

Sleeping comfy with his new machine

Specifics to pray for:

That he will get great oxygenation in the blood, that the number will stay in the high 90's-100 while he is at 21% oxygen.

Continue to have less episodes. He will remember first to breathe and second to breathe deep.

For the NICU staff to feel appreciated. They really don't know how thankful we are for them. That God will grant them wisdom in dealing with all the babies. That they will be blessed.

Finances. The bills are starting to come, but it's alright. Usually I am the one that is super stressed about the money, but God's been in control this whole journey and I will just let him stay in control with this one too!

Maddy. That she can have a bit of routine in this anything but routine next two months. For good sleep and good health. She's been having lots of ear infections and we were going to do tubes, but pray that she will just grow out of them.

Derek and I to continue to draw closer together and closer to The Lord.

Balance for me. It's a bit stressful trying to figure out work, pumping, and spending time with Joshua and Maddy. Pray that I can find the balance and feel good about it.

That God gets all the credit and glory!


Thanks and goodnight!

Joshua's Journey: Day 20

We put a picture of Joshua on the back of the headrest in the truck so that Maddy could see and know her brother. Derek got the cutest moment on video today when he told her to give Joshy a kiss. She took the picture and gave it a big ole kiss. Since she can't see her brother right now, we are trying to think of creative ways to help her, a 20 month old, get to know her brother!

I officially started back to work today, and I had the privilege of sharing Joshua's story with the jr. High students. It was so much fun just being able to share what God has already taught us through this time. It's super special to know that a  room full of jr. High and high school students are praying for little Joshua. He and we appreciates ALL of your prayers and support!

I'm being weighed!

We found out today that he's getting his picc line out tonight, so all the lines you see in the picture with the blue caps on them will be gone tomorrow! He also weighed 1160 grams today. I think that makes him back to 2 lbs 8 oz. That's exciting as well!! He still is having some episodes and needs to keep breathing deep more, but he's doing good. We are so proud of him!!

Specifics to pray for:

Daddy and Maddy's
afternoon nap.

That the picc line comes out smoothly and that he won't need it anymore. To stay infection free.

For his breathing to be strong and that he will remember to do it regularly.

For the tests to go great that are coming up next Monday.

He will continue to be fiesty!

That God will strengthen our marriage through this time and He will be glorified through it as well. Also, that He's glorified through every aspect of all of our lives.

For wisdom and blessing for the NICU staff. They are amazing!!


Y'all are amazing as well. Thank you from the bottom of our hearts for all the prayers!!

Joshua's Journey: Day 19

Be thankful for quiet days, when nothing special seems to be happening. Instead of being bored by the lack of action, use times of routine to seek My Face. (Jesus Calling, April 13) I have come to really enjoy the "quiet days" in the NICU. It's in those times that we can reflect on God's goodness and be thankful for the little miracle He has given us. We know that all days can't be quiet because we have to have opportunities to trust Him and allow Him to grow us.  Through this time we have found that we have LOTS to be thankful for even when the day seems mundane and uneventful.

Joshua has had a good day. He seemed to have a little bit of reflux, but seems to be tolerating his feeds. They added some calories to my milk starting today just to give him some extra calcium and other goodies that he needs as a preemie. Hopefully that will go well! One of my favorite things I enjoy about Joshua is him opening his eyes as we are talking to him. It's so much fun!!

Joshua dropped weight some tonight, but hopefully he will gain it back tomorrow. We ended the night the best way possible, snuggling together!

Maddy had a blast at Chuck E Cheese today and was glad her friend Hank could come too!

 










Specifics to pray for:

That Joshua continues to breathe well and can get over on the nasal canula as soon as his lungs are developed enough to handle it. The CPAP is a bit rough on his nose.

For his tests coming up in about a week. Second brain scan, eyes test and an Eco of his heart again.

That he will continue to tolerate his feeds and not have major issues with reflux.

For wisdom for all the NICU staff in dealing with all the babies in there.

For God to be glorified through all of our lives and that we will be a light to those around us.

Joshua's journey day 18

Dad's turn again.

I just want to start off by saying that Joshua had a pretty good day, followed up with a very comfortable night. Stephanie got to hold him this afternoon. He had a couple of episodes. When they got him back to bed, the wonderful nurse, Sheri sucked about a gallon of snot out of one of his nostrils. That is why he had a very comfortable night. He flipped to his tummy and hung out there for his dinner. When we got back to the NICU he was still snug as a bug on a rug, on his tummy! He ate all of his 3 pm and 6 pm food! He gained another ounce today. He is 2 lbs 8 ounces! He is almost ready to get into preemie clothes. At the moment he just hangs out with just his diaper on. I think most of the nurses are impressed by his beach muscles! He was good and feisty today, which is great! Can't wait to see the little guy tomorrow, we will be there from 4:30 to 6:30 again if you want to come by.

 

We are going to take Maddy to chuck e cheese tomorrow for lunch, and I think she will love it! Considering that she is usually confined to the waiting room, or Grammy and Papa's house. Papa even watches Maddy so Mimi can go up to see Joshua. They are great grandparents, Maddy, Joshua and myself are very lucky to have them in our lives.

Things to pray for.....

For Joshua to keep breathing on his own, so his episodes will not happen.

For his lungs to keep growing and getting stronger.

For Stephanie and Sue to feel better, both are a little under the weather.

For wisdom for the doctors and nurses. The nurses are very good at what they do. They are constantly moving and checking on the little ones. Kinda like a bunch of energizer bunnies.

For the other babies in the NICU and their parents. Joshua friend across the hall looks like he is getting ready to finally go home, and it is earlier than his due date!

I would like to thank everyone who is praying for my little guy, it means everything!

Joshua's Journey: Day 17

This is the day that I have made. Rejoice and be glad in it. Begin the day with open hands of faith, ready to receive all that I am pouring into this brief portion of your life. (Jesus Calling-April 11) It's so easy for us to rejoice when the days are going good or the way that we want them to. It's also easy to pray less and not really seek after God when things are going good. One of the doctors said it was easy to get complacent with Joshua in the beginning because he was doing so good. I feel like we are that way with God too. We pray and seek after Him so much more when things aren't going our way or are bad. That's not what a relationship is though and that's not what God wants. He wants us to go to Him just as much today when Joshua's having a great day as He did on Monday when he was having a very lousy day. He deserves our praise no matter the situation and I think He's really been showing me that through this journey.
I was able to hold Joshua today after not holding him since Sunday. We both could have sat there all day long! It's such an amazing feeling. He's quickly getting his feeds back up to where they were when they took him off for the blood transfusion and antibiotics. This afternoon he digested all of his food which means he is seeming to tolerate it well  He actually gained some weight last night (10 grams) which is not usual when he's off his feedings. He was 2 lbs 7 oz (1100 grams) tonight!!! We were able to give him his first sponge/rag bath today and I really think he enjoyed it. He was all squeaky clean when we left. He should sleep good tonight!












Specifics to pray for:

That Joshua's lungs get stronger and stronger. He's able to take deeper breaths and not get tired from it being such hard work.

For him to continue to be fiesty, but maybe not pull out his tube that helps him to breath.

For the health and rest for all the French family, especially Joshua.

He continues to have less and less episodes as his brain develops enough to communicate with the rest of the body.

For little Lucy who also is in the NICU for being born premature and her mom Brenda who has already done the NICU thing once before. Pray God will grow Lucy as well!

Wisdom and blessing for the NICU staff as they make it possible for us to go home and sleep good because we know they love our babies.

That God will be glorified through all of us and that we will be a light for Him.

Joshua's Journey: Day 16

As a walked over to Joshua this morning, I could see him moving all over the place. Feisty is what they like to call them, and feisty he was!! The blood transfusion went well and you could tell he had more blood. He got angry when they took out the IV and he turned bright red all over because all that blood was rushing to the surface!
They came in and talked to us about all the different cultures they did and the x-rays and basically think he had a minor UTI. They already put him on antibiotics as a precaution, so they will knock
it out. The only thing is that type of infection wouldn't really cause him to quit breathing like he was on Monday. They think that was caused by moving too fast on trying not to assist him with breathing or he is refluxing with his feeds. He started back his feeds today. So, hopefully he will be able to tolerate them well. He needs his milk so he can get strong and healthy! We have met a lot of people in the NICU and I would ask you to pray for the parents of the other kids and the other kids as you lift Joshua up. One family we were talking to has family in Montana and North Carolina. They said they are pretty much by themselves. (a little addition: We got to know that family as we were in the NICU. We have been to dinner together and their little boy, Cruz got out about a month after we got in. He is a cutie and we made great friends. We never expected that to happen!!) It makes me even more grateful for y'all! Thank you so much for all the love, support and prayers. The messages and text messages are so encouraging and help to get us through each day. God is amazing and we have learned so much on this journey. He's using it to shape us more into the person He wants us to be. It has allowed me to focus on what's important instead of some of the petty things I used to think were so important. Thanks for taking this journey with us. We really could not do it without you!

They always tuck him in, but he prefers the feet out!

Specifics to pray for:

They will get him on the best antibiotics with the least side effects.

His whole body will continue to grow. Lungs become more mature and he takes deep breaths.

His episodes continue to become less and less.

Wisdom and blessings on NICU staff as they care for all the babies.



God shows us how we can most glorify Him through Joshua's story.

For continued feistiness in Joshua!

Fir the health of all of us. Maddy and I seem to be trying to kick a cold.


If any of y'all want to come up to see Joshua, we will be at the hospital from 4:30-6 tomorrow. Come on by!

Joshua's Journey: Day 15

The roller coaster  began to incline again today after what felt like a huge drop to us yesterday. Though the climb back up might feel slower, the one thing I can say is that God is faithful and He is our constant in all of this chaos. My prayers just keep going back to God being Joshua's strength during this time that he is so weak and little, and that as He gets older and has the choice to either depend on his own self for strength or God's that he will choose to continue to rely on God for his strength and guidance! That is and will be Derek and my job to model that and teach him and Maddy that as they get older. What a privilege but also what a responsibility at the same time. I guess he really wanted to give us a chance to practice what We preach in that area. It so easy for us to want to be our own strength, but it just never works out for us when we do that because that was never how it was meant to be.

Joshua had a good day today. He had an episode at about 7 am and didn't have one the rest of the day until we left around 9:30. God is good and all of your hardcore prayer worked and is beyond appreciated.

As I was praying, I decided to read Psalm 25, because that was the day he was born and this is what stuck out to me:

Show me your ways, O Lord, teach me your paths; guide me in your truth and teach me, for you are God my Savior, and MY HOPE IS IN YOU ALL DAY LONG. Psalm 25:4-6



He's ready to get some blood!

 



Maddy has been a trooper hanging out at the hospital.

Specifics to pray:

That the blood transfusion will help him to carry blood and oxygen throughout his body better and that he will begin to produce his own red blood cells at a faster rate.

For his lungs to continue to grow and mature and that he will be able to take deep breaths on his own without the machine having to help him.

For God to be his and all of our strength during this tough time but also when times are going good.

For blessings on and wisdom for the NICU staff as they decide what is best for Joshua and the other babies.

That as they begin to feed him again, he will tolerate the feedings and not have issues with reflux.

If he did have an infection that the antibiotics will work to knock it out!

God will be glorified through all of this and we will be a light for Him.

Joshua's Journey: Day 14

Today I think has been one of the hardest days of my life. They said that this would be a roller coaster, but we had been on such a high for a while that I was hoping there wouldn't be any drops or that if there were, they wouldn't be so big. He just kept having episode after episode of his oxygen dropping and everything they tried didn't help him get any better. I just stood there feeling helpless and scared. I sent out a Facebook message for people to pray for the doctors and for him to be more feisty and he definitely was much more feisty when we left for dinner. They did an x-ray of his lungs and stomach and said both look good. They put him on antibiotics in case he has an infection and then took blood and urine samples to see if there is any issue there. They also changed his machine from cpap to something that will help take breaths for him if he's not breathing like he should. Also, they are going to stop the feeds and put him on nutrition through his picc line to see if it might be from reflux.   His hematocrit, which shows the percentage of red blood cells in his blood came back a little low, so if it doesn't go up, they said he might end up needing a blood transfusion. They said it being low could also be a cause of the oxygen drops.  It's hard not to want to take control in a time like this, but if I were to be in control, I would have no idea what to do. So that's where the praying and trusting the doctors and nurses to know what to do to best help Joshua comes in. We've definitely had to trust God in the past, but this is far more out of our comfort zone than we've ever been as individuals or a married couple. So please pray for us to just have the strength each day for whatever trials come our way. Thank you so much for all the prayers!



Specifics to pray for:

That he will produce his own red blood cells and not end up needing a blood transfusion.

That he'll have the strength to take deep breaths and not tire out as easily.

If there is an infection, that the antibiotics will work well in treating it.

For wisdom for all the NICU staff to know exactly what Joshua needs and be able to help him get better.

For God to be all of our strengths in times of weakness

That God would be glorified through it all.

Joshua's Journey: Day 13

We just left from telling Joshua goodnight and overall he has had a good day. He had a little bit of a rough time while he was laying on me, but they got him repositioned and he was good to go! The weighed him while we were there and he was 2 lbs 6 oz. which makes him back to birth weight. Hooray!! Derek and I can't thank you enough for the prayers, posts and texts of encouragement and support we have from all of you! We love you all.

 

     

Specific requests:

That God will be glorified and given the praise for all that He has and will do in Joshua's life

He continues to gain weight and eat well

Wisdom for the NICU staff

Rest for everyone

That we have opportunities to share Christ with people through Joshua's story

Joshua's Journey: Day 12

Today was a roller coaster day for me. Though I didn't really do much, my lack of sleep and having a baby, even though small has caught up to me. Joshua had many episodes last night and after having a lung scan, they decided to put him back on cpap. The nasal canula just wasn't giving his still little lungs the oxygen he needed to breath comfortably and not get worn out. At fist I was thinking this was a step back, but as I really thought and prayed and cried about it, I realized that God's timing isn't always our timing. Maybe he was rushed a bit onto the nasal canula and God wanted him to be on cpap a little longer to develop his lungs a bit more! I have been praying that he would have less episodes, and that prayer has been answered since his been back on cpap.

We have seen the love and power of community in so many ways in the past two weeks. From anonymous gifts to gift cards, cards, some Nikes (love me some new kicks) and SO MUCH prayer. God has been faithful. We met some people today for the first time that said they had been praying constantly for Joshua. Though I know it's true with so many other people, it was just amazing to witness it first hand.



Specific requests:

That God will be glorified today by our family

Continue to pray for his breathing, continued less episodes.

That he will eat well, they will feed him the right amount of food and he will gain weight.

For wisdom for all the staff in the NICU as they care for Joshua and all the other kids in there.

For rest and health of all of us.

Joshua's Journey: Day 11

I walked in to see Joshua today and he was wide eyed and looked super comfy. He sleeps on a pillow that molds to his body however they want it to. I'd be comfy too!! I was able to hold him again today and we listened to KSBJ. He seemed to really enjoy it! He went up on the amount of food he gets again today, and he's eating all of it too! They weighed him while we were there. He's still at 2 lbs 4 oz, but lost 20 grams. I am hoping he will get back to his birth weight by Monday!

We will be at the hospital tomorrow from 4:30-6 (Saturday) if you would like to come see him!

Specifics to pray for:

That God is glorified and we have opportunities to be a light to others around us.

That Joshua's episodes of not breathing become less and less.

He stays infection and fever free.

Rest for everyone! Maddy's schedule has been completely changed and she has a hard time going to sleep.

Joshua's Journey: Day 10

Today is the day that we finally get to see Joshua's eyes for more than 20 minutes. He's done getting his tan on and he's opening his little eyes. It's so much fun watching him!

I can't help but feel that excited anticipation for the day we finally get to strap him and Maddy in the back seat and take him home for the first time. It gives me just a glimpse of how Christ must feel as He's waiting for the time He too can bring us home. I can just see Him each day asking the Father, "is it time yet?" I know we still have a while to go, but I can't help but hope for and dream about that day!!

Joshua is starting to really get an appetite. He went up on feedings on Tuesday, from 4 times a day to 8 times a day, and the last two days they have increased the amount of food he's getting. Hopefully that will mean gaining some more weight!!!  He was 2 lbs 4 oz!

Derek was able to hold Joshua. He looked so comfy snuggled up on his daddy!

Specifics to pray for:

For him to  remember to breathe and have less episodes of forgetting!

He tolerates and digests all the food he is given.

That he will continue to gain weight!

I took another blood test today to make sure my white blood cells are back to normal from the infection, please pray that they are.

That as we have opportunites to tell others about his story, that God will get the glory and that people will come to know Him through his story!

Joshua's Journey: Day 9

Derek was able to stay home today and hang out with Joshua and Uncle David who flew in to see his nephew for the day. Joshua is doing really good, thanks first to God and second to all of your fervent prayers!

We have got the majority of all the tests done that need to be done until about a month, so hopefully he will have a bit of a break from all the poking and prodding. I was able to hold him for about two hours today. It's crazy how fast time flies when I'm holding him!

Here's my favorite picture yet!

Specifics to pray for:

That Joshua's picc line stays clot free and uninfected. We don't want him to have to get a new one before the 30 days!

That he remembers to breathe, and that the episodes of him forgetting become less and less.

 He continues to eat well and pee well. They increased the amount of milk he's getting along with the number of times he eats each day, which may have something to do with him to quit breathing for a second or two.

He continues to gain weight. He's 2 lbs 4 oz tonight.

For his blood pressure to stay in the low normal levels. It's been a bit high at times.

That God gets the praise He deserves for all He has done and is going to do through Joshua and that He will be glorified.

For Derek's ankle to feel better ASAP!

You prayers and support are so appreciated. We love y'all!! We will be at the hospital from 4:30-6 today if anyone wants to go see him. The only issue, which I do not like since it keeps some students from seeing him, is you have to be at least 16.

Joshua's Journey: Day 8

Well, it's been an entire week now and I must say, God is good! He's already taught us so much this first week. Derek's going to do the honors of blogging tonight: it's been 24 hours since I've seen my son, that's 1,440 minutes. It's hard, very hard to try and go about your daily workday and concentrate on work and not think about how my son is doing. Yesterday I only thought he was getting a brain scan but then steph texted something about a heart thing, then a picc line. I'm about an hour and twenty minutes away at work and all these things are going on and I'm an hour away from my family. It's hard. So when I got home today Stephanie asked me to pick her up from the hospital but I can't see him b/c they are about to do the picc line again, 100 yards away from my son but I can't see him. His environment for the procedure is sterile. It's hard. My best friend Lloyd said I ruptured my tendon  in my ankle and it hurts, but not as much as not seeing my son. But one thing I know is that God will not put us through anything that we can not handle. I'm blessed to have a wife with such a string faith as well as being surrounded by friends and family that are strong believers. When I talked to my friend that is from Canada he said he was getting his whole school to pray for Joshua and that really got to me, it's such a comfort to hear people say that they are praying for my son. Thank you so much  for the support.

Seeing Stephanie hold Joshua was one of the best moments of my life so far, they both looked so happy. I loved seeing him with the new nasal thing on, I could see his face finally. I had a moment where I could not see how people could not believe in a Creator. He is beautiful, perfectly made, right on time just as God wanted. I know He has some huge plans for this little guy. I can't wait to see them unfold.

Prayers:

-That Joshua grows stronger and stronger.
- for the nurses and doctors, anything that they are needing prayers for
- for God to show his power and glory through Joshua

Till next time

Dad

Joshua's Journey: Day 7

Thy will be done.....those words kept popping in my mind all day yesterday and I kept trying to push them away. I mean, thy will be done for where I live, what school I go to, or even being a missionary clear across the world, but thy will be done with this baby, my son, you have entrusted me to? All I could think about was Abraham and Isaac or Jesus and the cross. I was not ready for Thy Will be done with Joshua Derek French. The more I pushed it away, the more it kept coming back stronger. After a lot of tears and talking with Derek, my rock, I submitted to His will. Does it freak me out, honestly, yes, but it's just caused me to pray 100 times harder that he grows up to be a neonatal doctor, a pastor, or the next Tim Tebow.  God is in control. I have no doubt in that and I pray that He will be glorified through Joshua's story.

Here are some praised and updates from today:

He is off the CPAP oxygen and is now on something smaller in his nose. The Thing he was on was getting too small, but the next size up was too big. I love the new thing because we can see his face so much better.

HIS ULTRASOUND ON THE BRAIN CAME BACK NORMAL. Thank you Lord!!!

He received an echo of his heart today too. Pray that it comes back normal too!

He received a PICC line today, but it didn't work, so they are going to try again tomorrow. Pray that this one works well and it doesn't get infected.

Specific requests:

Pray that his intestines grow and develop properly and he will be infection free.

Pray that he will continue to gain weight. He gained another ounce, making him 2 lbs 2 oz

He doubles his feedings starting tomorrow, pray that he tolerates it and digests it well.

Pray for Derek. He just did something to his ankle and it's all swollen and achy!

Pray that God will be glorified through our lives.


Thank you for the prayers. I cannot even comprehend how many people are praying for this kid. We can't even begin to express how grateful we are.